Sacred Clothing

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Suspenders are oblivious

To their importance

They hold shit up

Panties can only be pink once

Bras are too self-involved

Gloves never lay a hand on anything

Belts are for the buttless

Tightening up when uncomfortable

Loosening up after a few drinks

Jock Straps think too much

About Athletic Support

Jeans are multitaskers

With concentration problems

Especially if theyโ€™re hugging hips

T-Shirts only want to play

When itโ€™s time for bed

Unless theyโ€™re a Pocket Tee

Then they have an identity crisis

Nylons can get along with anyone

Until their toes get stiff

Or their conversation skills sag

Zip ups are perverted ass pinchers

Buttons get too attached

Scarves are spiritual masters

Of Body and Soul, Yin and Yang

Unless they are 100% wool

Jackets are pretenders

to the throne of Coats

Turtlenecks are creepy

Pajamas play hooky

Drink Spanish Coffee

Lay around watching soaps

Ponchos live precariously

If they are fringed

They might be seen at night

But quickly disappear in the day

A blouse is a blouse is a blouse

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35 Comments on “Sacred Clothing

  1. Don’t think you missed a garment in of my humans closets. All seem to have neurosis – maybe that’s why humans are so mentally disturbed – it’s catching. We dogs don’t have such problems since we don’t wear clothes. Maybe you humans should start going naked.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’d be lost without my belts & many people would be visually assaulted daily when my pants fell down sans my belt especially since I seldom wear panties and despite my best efforts I am one of the “buttless”…

    Hahahaha it’s all true and I enjoyed your post ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  3. this made me feel all kinds of emotions . well done . Bravo . amazing ๐Ÿ™‚
    i loved it from the beginning to the end .

    Liked by 1 person

  4. How brilliant! I have never met anyone that has YET to write anything like this on clothings! LOL
    I really love this, Awesome, really!

    Even these first few steps … hahahaha … Awesome! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Suspenders are oblivious

    To their importance

    They hold shit up

    Liked by 1 person

  5. ‘Belts are for the buttless’
    ‘A blouse is a blouse is a blouse’

    Those lines killed me!!๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    This is beautiful.

    Like

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