Never Smooch A Brooch

Posted on March 23, 2015 by

 

 

Nancy Cunard

Nancy Cunard

Always walk arm and arm

With a purse. They’re insecure

And get addicted to junk

Don’t listen to babbling bracelets

They get caught up in the apparel

Never hang out with a trashy trinket

Necklaces will fool you

With spoiled-ass sweet talk

Keep them behind buttons

Or they’ll wink at any old dog tag

Don’t let a ring control things

Anklets can be footloose

Make sure they wear bells while jingling

Earrings think they’re trapeze artists

Dangling high, unless their studs

Then one’s fine, two’s ok

Three or more is an orgy

Toe rings stink

Don’t give into those

Snotty little nose rings

Divulge nothing to pinky rings

They’re not mature enough

For indiscriminate indexing

Can you believe the gall of the tiara?

Never let a choker get its hands on you

Bangles are for bums and beehives

Rosaries want to wait until they’re married

Then all hell breaks loose

Never smooch a brooch

Heavy Woman In Costume

 

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31 Responses to Never Smooch A Brooch

  1. Sherrie de Valeria says:
    March 23, 2015 at 10:54 am

    If this is how I see how stuffs are using your eyes, then I’ll be very suspicious with all my jewelery! LOL 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. Andrea C. says:
    March 23, 2015 at 11:27 am

    Love this! How refreshingly unique and rhythmic.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  4. A Rhythm Runs Through It says:
    March 23, 2015 at 12:11 pm

    Great piece, Elan! Funny, with a fresh approach to everyday things; reminds me a bit of Ogden Nash. Way to go! Jamy

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  6. blkkat49 says:
    March 23, 2015 at 12:24 pm

    Intriguing. You must have quite the haberdashery, between the hats, and now the jewelry. Can’t wait to meet the next cheeky accessories.

    Like

    Reply
  7. vjearle says:
    March 23, 2015 at 12:50 pm

    Love it! Made me smile. Jewelry says so much about the wearer.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  8. calensariel says:
    March 23, 2015 at 1:04 pm

    LOL I’m sitting here trying to imagine this as a picture book!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  9. Ian Hamlin says:
    March 23, 2015 at 1:52 pm

    Fantastic! NEVER smooch a brooch! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  11. erbiage says:
    March 23, 2015 at 3:28 pm

    Cheeky! never smooch a brooch, especially not the pin side!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  13. M-R says:
    March 23, 2015 at 6:56 pm

    Wonderful imagination ! – I’m impressed. And jealous.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  14. Onu-Okpara Chiamaka says:
    March 23, 2015 at 8:26 pm

    Reblogged this on Tall tales from valerie and commented:
    Hey people. I have a little something from Elan Mudrow. I like this. A lot. Elan knows how to use words. You should check out the blog “Elan Mudrow”.

    Enjoy.

    Like

    Reply
  15. tundewrites says:
    March 23, 2015 at 10:40 pm

    The style brings a new perception, never smooch a brooch! Nice!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  16. worksbyrenato says:
    March 24, 2015 at 6:31 pm

    A very proud and powerful piece! Very extensive and visual, I love the concept of jewelry and luxury weighing down the true soul inside. Good writing. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  18. desertdweller29 says:
    March 27, 2015 at 12:19 pm

    I love this! So creative.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  19. lilly1949 says:
    April 1, 2015 at 10:04 am

    But…I love a pretty brooch!

    Like

    Reply
  20. Spec Fic Girl says:
    April 5, 2015 at 7:10 pm

    Beware the choker…

    Loved reading this, Elan! I think you’ve effectively covered the contents of my jewelery collection. 😉

    Like

    Reply
  21. Shirley Burley says:
    June 20, 2015 at 8:06 am

    Awesome! Love to ascribe personalities to inanimate objects 🙂

    Like

    Reply
  22. The Rose Alchemist says:
    November 28, 2015 at 6:21 pm

    Oh my gosh, I love these Fashion series! They’re really entertaining to read.

    Like

    Reply

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