Woolens Are Overprotective

Posted on April 2, 2015 by

182a9ca945c6d6d6391e9ee1746421d1

 

Argyles are in cahoots

With high waters

And can recite, from memory,

Dialogue from Star Trek

Nylons want to make

Believe they are free and easy

But run when the going gets tough

Woolens are overprotective

Leg warmers brag

And want to be looked at

Especially if teamed with cut-offs

Knee-highs play games

But are slipped off easily

No-shows always peek, peep,

and take a gander at bony ankles

Crew socks are players

Dress socks have personality disorders.

They go to church, weddings, funerals

And dinner parties, Otherwise,

They stay at home in the drawer.

Panty hose, Ahh fuck, who named those?

Tights need to keep it together

Stay positive, be sensible, never droop

Or get too down about things

Toe socks get overly attached

Sock puppets are imposters

Never believe them

They are gloves! I swear!

Tubing needs to be outlawed

Fishnets catch more then they can handle

Bobby socks can be found lurking

Around retirement facilities

And should be over the calf by now

Socklets need to grow up and get over it

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48 Responses to Woolens Are Overprotective

  1. ankursurin says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:09 pm

    This is brilliant!!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
  2. digestibleink says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:16 pm

    Reblogged this on Off The Cuff's Poetry Sleeve and commented:
    A wonderful musing on the mystery of footie wear.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. marialla says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:21 pm

    YUK! YUK!! WHAT A FUN PIECE !! THANKS FOR THE FUN PIECE!1 MADE MY DAY!! Mari

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  4. marialla says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:23 pm

    YUK! YUK!! WHAT A FANTASTIC PIECE!! SOOOOOOOOOO FUN – MADE MY DAY!! LOVELY, GREAT WORK.. Mari

    Like

    Reply
  5. darendark says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:28 pm

    This was positively hilarious! Had me grinning ear to ear. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  6. calensariel says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:35 pm

    Nylons want to make Believe they are free and easy But run when the going gets tough / Dress socks have personality disorders… Oh, you DO need to be writing for Disney. I can just picture you writing dialog for something like the dishes in Beauty and the Beast. LOL

    Like

    Reply
  7. nydia says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:39 pm

    Ha ha haaaa! So clever and really hilarious! Thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  8. edwinasepisodes says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:54 pm

    Wonderful poem, really clever. I do love the pics that you use too 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  9. familyrulesbyplainjane says:
    March 30, 2015 at 12:59 pm

    The panty hose line did it for me! Second fave is the nerd Star Trek part. Enjoying your imagination very much.

    Like

    Reply
  10. afairymind says:
    March 30, 2015 at 1:43 pm

    I love this! Very amusing. Sock puppets are definitely imposters! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  11. anthonyhowelljournal says:
    March 30, 2015 at 2:07 pm

    Wow, this is a great poem! Can I share it to Grey Suit: Poem Stream?

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  13. Foghorn The IKonoclast says:
    March 30, 2015 at 2:25 pm

    Lovely legs and the leggings (I am a guy) are awesome.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  14. bowmanauthor says:
    March 30, 2015 at 3:00 pm

    So cute and funny!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  15. Arwen says:
    March 30, 2015 at 4:22 pm

    This made me laugh out loud. Brilliant work.

    Like

    Reply
  16. vivachange77 says:
    March 31, 2015 at 7:57 am

    Really fun! I love this. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  17. mmwelch says:
    March 31, 2015 at 11:29 am

    Thanks for the follow. Love this poem – and the photos!

    Like

    Reply
  18. ruth ann scanzillo says:
    March 31, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    Somebody already took the words right out of……..”This is brilliant!” (Refrain) (Dal Segno)

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  20. Dusty Writes says:
    March 31, 2015 at 6:34 pm

    This is SO clever!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  21. crimsonprose says:
    March 31, 2015 at 11:18 pm

    A Sock-Man, I see. And very well done.

    Like

    Reply
  22. Katie Z. says:
    April 1, 2015 at 12:02 am

    Sock puppets are imposters…love it!

    Like

    Reply
  23. DilwinK says:
    April 1, 2015 at 12:17 am

    Cleverly done and effortlessly funny yet it made me think. Bravo I really liked it!

    Like

    Reply
  24. lilly1949 says:
    April 1, 2015 at 10:01 am

    Enjoyed reading this clever observation of such a mundane thing. Only a poet!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  26. theramblinggaraidh says:
    April 1, 2015 at 4:10 pm

    This is cute, in a sort of Suess-ish way. Definitely made me feel a little happier today.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  27. zacharybinks19 says:
    April 1, 2015 at 11:15 pm

    LOVE the personifications! It takes some clever thinking to come up with that many unique identities for something as mundane as socks! >:P

    Like

    Reply
  28. Spec Fic Girl says:
    April 5, 2015 at 7:16 pm

    Reblogged this on Reven Archer Black: Author of Fantasy & Speculative Fiction and commented:
    Giggling at this fantastic, witty piece by Elan Mudrow. Truly a fun read. Three of my fave lines just to whet the literary appetite…

    “Nylons want to make
    Believe they are free and easy
    But run when the going gets tough”

    Ain’t that the truth.
    – RAB

    Like

    Reply
  29. jason c. segarra says:
    April 6, 2015 at 5:37 am

    I love the mundane given life (and much humor, in this case) and will never, in life, look at socks of any kind with a straight face again! Awesome read!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  30. Daleen says:
    April 10, 2015 at 12:47 pm

    I can’t believe I somehow missed this post! I always frantically open my mails and scan through them for your commentary on clothing and characters. I always thought of fishnets as whores in training and black shimmer nylons as the ones who qualified… Reblogging this on https://undertakerstories.wordpress.com/

    Like

    Reply
  31. Daleen says:
    April 10, 2015 at 12:51 pm

    Reblogged this on My Grandfather was an Undertaker and commented:
    If you have never read any of Elan’s ‘The Fashion Series’, here is a taste. You can see an entire wardrobe of associations to characters on her blog

    Like

    Reply

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