Elan Mudrow
Smidgens
Christmas Photo Album
In the Christmas photo album…..
Ghosts run among the pages
Through images stuffed with
Santas and snowmen.
My sister’s ghost gives Indian burns
My brother’s ghost I didn’t know
Began to know
And sometimes wished
I still didn’t know
Young ghosts of daughters
Tell horrid tales of their mother
While through their anger
A language of love spills out
My father’s ghost has freckled arms
Snow ice cream, steel rail sleds
A guilt that cannot be mended
That does not need to be
My mother’s ghosts appear
As foster babies
No one knew, no one knows
Stereoscope faces like photos
Adopted memories
The Christmas photo album
Is a book of history
Inclined to judgments
A mixing of truth and fiction
Locked into a close reading
A house in constant repair
Reparation and preparation
Holding children in its pages
Who have passed on
Who are still passing on
My ghost
Contains frozen interpretations..
Not only from my family’s perspective
But, my own.
A part of me that never existed
Yet exists in movements
All muddled together,
Inside various versions of
A boy who would be a girl
A girl who would be a boy
Neither of what became to be
Both of what would become of me
Such strong arms
Such feminine fingers
Such rugged looks
Such pretty features
A ghost who still believes
In the power of creativity
But, proclaims it logically
With a present-day smile
And dark circles under my eyes
Another photo is added to the book
Click here for what I mean by close reading
Click here for an explanation of Confessional Poetry
19 Comments on “Christmas Photo Album”
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Elan Mudrow 
Such power and beauty in this!
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Stumbled here and scrolled into a poem. A layered picture poem. I traveled with you to the end.
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Writing is an amazing skill
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I really like this poem
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Pingback: Old photo album | erbiage
You inspired this: https://erbiage.wordpress.com/2016/12/30/old-photo-album/
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Very nice. We all become ghosts, nothing left but memories, until those too pass on. Then a photo book might remain, it’s stories absent, a book of ghosts.
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Absolutely beautifully written
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That is the strange thing about Christmas. Tradition makes everything wonderful and opens up wounds at the same time. Haunting and exquisite poem.
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One of the most amazing poems that I have ever read on this website, and I am so thrilled for the next one!
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Captivating piece.
Thank you.
Hoping the Spirit of Christmas Present finds you well, and the Spirit of Christmas Future calls on you with love and blessings.
Seek peace,
Paz
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Yes, the ghosts are there in the album, but why do I get the regret, the guilt, the pain more than the joy, the family growing together, the beauty of learning and growing? Was the past really mostly difficult and sad? Even Christmas?
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A very good post.Thanks for sharing!
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Touching poem about the ghosts of Christmas Past. How well do we ever know anybody, right? Esp love the ending, the present day that will move into the past, just part of the larger story. 🙂
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Enjoyed your Christmas poems!
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Amazing story! Hope you had a wonderful Christmas celebration!
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Mother’s pantsuits, brother’s moustache and macramé. A universal time stamp. People we’ve known and never knew. This one is a standout. No dexterous cleverness, but a bucket of heart. More memories to you, and a Happy New Year.
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Great little piece of writing. Emotional honesty without melodrama. Love it.
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I hope you and your family had a good Christmas. Happy New Year!
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