Tag: Comedy

American Work Day

Try to get up Notice in the mirror, as you get ready for work, a cowlick that just won’t go away. Curse at every known god in the universe. Glue it down (partially) with Dippity Doo Ultra Toxic Glue Gel Stop at Starbucks. Order…

Hair Yell

It’s ok to use a little hairspray To keep it out of your eyes Glue it down, rearrange it Before you lose your mind And yell at the mirror Blaming your cowlick On that worn pillow You named Mr. Flattie Throwing aside Pregnant Betty…

American Grocery List

Broccoli Carrots Romaine Lettuce Avocado Spinach Mary’s Virgin Olive Oil Dave’s Corporate Fiber Bread Weightwatchers scammy little peanut chipotle BBQ tempeh tenders Red Wine, preferably under ten dollars Soy curly fries Buy a salad, premade, in a plastic bag Put back the broccoli, carrots,…

You Are Never Gonna Be Written

Well,   There’s a sliver of night That says to me, write However, I gotta worry About evening’s strange plight    ‘Cause,   Night is undependable Unpredictable, and unreliable It’s the “UnCola” ….it’s liable To be too soft and pliable   Bending,   My…

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Meeting The Family

I meet your family. The toothless, the fairy The hobbit, and the biker. And I don’t know why I feel at home While needing to escape To the library   You meet my family. The munchkin, the brain The witch, and the calculator. And you…

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