Tag: Fashion

Laminate Is A Pervert

  Don’t snuggle with a rug Unless properly vacuumed And groomed Hardwoods are bit ornery but shine right up When waxed with love Hook Shag up with a van They’re meant for each other Indoor Outdoor likes it both ways Tiles are squares, most…

Woolens Are Overprotective

  Argyles are in cahoots With high waters And can recite, from memory, Dialogue from Star Trek Nylons want to make Believe they are free and easy But run when the going gets tough Woolens are overprotective Leg warmers brag And want to be…

Beanies Are Babyish

  Hairnets keep things in place Caps are con artists Indecisive little shits, who Don’t want to be pinned down Derbies are dumbfounded Stovepipes are bearded with warts Stocking caps muffle their words Then get lost in the snow Unless they have a tassel…

Casuals Don’t Fool Anyone

  Slippers are for cowards Slip-ons are for Christmas Morning hung-over dads Sandals are for white people forced into dreadlocks on their way to burn a man Dancing out of their money eating spiced tempeh fries disguised as Jesus peyote offered by the naturopath…

%d bloggers like this:
%d bloggers like this:
%d bloggers like this:
%d bloggers like this: